20 things men say when they're unfaithful

It's almost as if they all went to the same school of infidelity.

20 things men say when they're unfaithful

It's almost as if they all went to the same school of infidelity.
  • Every man who is unfaithful uses the same phrases. Cheaters want the best of both worlds - if they no longer wanted to be with their wives, they would leave their homes and just start a new love life, but they do not go. Instead, they lie to help maintain the security of their current relationship and still keep their lover on the side. They use these 20 phrases to try and keep both.

  • If your husband uses these phrases, chances are he's just trying not to lose you or his lover.

  • 1. "You're cheating on me, aren't you?"

  • When your husband uses this phrase, he's trying to make you feel guilty. Instead of focusing on his infidelity, you'll be focused on proving how much you love him and convincing him that you'll never be able to do something like that.

  • 2. "You're not who I thought you were"

  • Again, everything is on your shoulders. He makes you feel like you're to blame for lying to him about the kind of person you really are. Obviously this is not true, but by blaming yourself, you'll be distracted and will turn a blind eye to his infidelity.

  • 3. "I'm going to wash my own clothes"

  • This might seem sweet, but if this seems out of character for him, it's probably because he has something to hide.

  • 4. "I was working late"

  • If your husband has always been a workaholic, this may be true, but if working more hours than normal seems strange, he might be seeing another woman.

  • 5. "I still love you"

  • Although it may surprise you, most unfaithful husbands claim to still be in love with their wives.

  • 6. "I never wanted to hurt you"

  • And it may be true. Someone who's unfaithful usually is a very egocentric person who only concentrates on what he wants and needs at that moment. His intention is not to hurt you, it is only to satisfy himself.

  • 7. "I don't want to lose you"

  • Shouldn't he have thought of that before he cheated on you? He's hoping that you'll be able to focus on his love and ignore his betrayal.

  • 8. "She means nothing to me"

  • Most unfaithful men act in a moment of thoughtlessness, and might be telling the truth.

  • 9. "I didn't know what I was doing"

  • Maybe alcohol did cloud his judgement, but that doesn't justify his actions.

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  • 10. "It only happened once"

  • This is one of the most famous phrases of an unfaithful man. They never did before, and they will never do it again. Usually, a man who cheated will confess his one-time mistake because the guilt is too much to handle.

  • 11. "It will never happen again"

  • When a man is caught cheating, most promise never to do it again. But once trust is broken, the rules of the relationship must change in order to gain that trust back.

  • 12. "I thought of you but I still can't explain why I did it"

  • This excuse sounds probably brilliant in his mind, but it gives no comfort to his wife. If you were on his mind, then why did it happen in the first place?

  • 13. "I never saw her before in my life"

  • Husbands don't want their wives to know if the women they're cheating with is someone they knew before. However, it doesn't matter who she is. What matters is his unfaithfulness.

  • 14. "I can't believe you don't trust me. Your mistrust is going to end with our relationship"__

  • What will end the relationship is his unfaithfulness, not a lack of trust.

  • 15. "You're always rejecting me"

  • This phrase may be true, and although the lack of intimacy does not justify infidelity, physical intimacy is crucial in keeping a relationship alive.

  • 16. "She pushed me to do it"

  • Really? This excuse is a desperate effort to try and explain the unexplainable.

  • 17. "It's not what it seems"

  • Yes, it is exactly as it looks.

  • 18. "It's your imagination"

  • Don't let him trick you into thinking nothing happened.

  • 19. "I've changed. I am a new man"

  • Infidelity is almost like alcoholism, it takes a process of long and hard work to return to "being a new man". You do not get up and stop being unfaithful overnight.

  • 20. "You're being dramatic, we're just friends"

  • If so, then he will have no problem proving that there is nothing romantic between himself and this other woman.

  • If you think your husband might be unfaithful, address it calmly and lovingly. If you attack with anger, he will only get defensive. Infidelity doesn't necessarily mean the end of a marriage, so long as you are patient and genuinely try to reconcile your relationship.

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  • This article has been translated and adapted from the original "21 cosas que los hombres le dicen a sus esposas cuando son" which was originally published on

Mariel Reimann is the content manager for She studied law at the National University of Cordoba and currently resides in Salt Lake City, Utah.

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