You just got engaged. Who do you tell first?

Congrats! You're engaged! It's time to spread the news. Where do you start?

You just got engaged. Who do you tell first?

Congrats! You're engaged! It's time to spread the news. Where do you start?
  • It's the moment many of us wait for. A proposal. An acceptance (YES!). An engagement to be married. You've found the person you want to spend the rest of your life with and now it's time to share the great news with friends and loved ones.

  • A recent article explored who newly engaged couples told first, and how they spread the good news. 76% said they shared it on social media; 75% told their mom first (or the bride's mom); and 32% told the family members of their spouse first.

  • (Please note: the survey participants could choose each answer that applied, so the percentages do not add up to 100%.)

  • Interestingly, men and women tend to share the news in a different order. For men, they first tell their spouse's mom, their dad, a friend, and last, their spouse's dad (hey...what happened to asking the father's permission first?). Women usually tell their mom, then dad, a friend and then sibling.

  • As for spreading the news via social media, women are more likely than men to post a picture of the ring, an announcement via a status update, or share the news with a photo or video.

  • Who do you tell first?

  • Parents, especially mothers, are probably the best place to start. After all, they'll probably play key roles in the planning (and paying for) of the wedding and reception. They also have dreamt of this day for as long as you have, if not longer. Parents want to celebrate in this joyous occasion with you and your soon-to-be spouse-a.k.a. their new son/daughter-in-law.

  • Next, tell your closest friends. Some of these people will be bridesmaids or groomsmen and will also be a major part of your celebration. Friends will also want to be part of celebrating this happy moment with you.

  • Lastly, couples can create a post to social media (but only if that's your thing!). A change in relationship status, post a new status update, upload a happy picture, or whatever else you want to do to make it social media "official."

  • How do you share the news?

  • There are so many creative ways to share your engagement news. Pinterest and YouTube are full of super cute and creative announcement ideas.

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  • Here are a few, quick suggestions of what that could be:

    • A picture of you and your fiancé holding your wedding date

    • A video of the proposal

    • A picture of the ring

    • A picture or two with the caption "I asked...he/she said yes!"

  • Whatever you do, do it the way you want that fits you and your future spouse's style. Make the decision together-the first of many you'll make as a couple.

  • Deciding to marry the love of your life is a big step in any relationship. Once you make that choice, it's important to share your big news with those who love and support you as a couple the most. It is your big day, but allowing others to celebrate it with you will make it much more joyous.

Wendy is a regular contributor for and does media reviews. Website: for victims of sexual abuse. Blog: Twitter: @WendyJessen


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