What I crave most from marriage is the total committment to another person. I don’t have to worry about another person eclipsing my relationship because I pick him and he picks me.
And that relationship is bigger than not kissing someone else, sleeping with someone else or being physically involved with someone else. True fidelity means completely becoming one with your love.
So if being faithful means more than not being physical with someone else, what does it mean?
It means you don’t flirt with anyone else
If a woman is touching your elbow and batting her eyelashes at you, you don’t make flirty comments back at her. You don’t feed the interaction just to feed your own ego because the attention feels good. You know that just because this interaction won’t “go anywhere” it’s not harmless.
It means you’re a willing sexual partner to your spouse
Being faithful to your spouse means fulfilling his needs. Sure, there are times when you really can’t be intimate, but beware of letting these times add up. Fidelity in marriage means strengthening your bond through intimacies that are unique to your marriage relationship.
It means you don’t talk negatively about your spouse
As a loyal friend, you don’t let anyone speak poorly about your friend, and you wouldn’t talk behind her back either. So in a marriage, that need to speak positively about your partner is heightened. Fidelity means making your spouse look good because you have her back (instead of talking behind it). If you have issues you need to discuss, take them up with her.
It means you don’t tell secrets to someone else
You are sharing a life with your spouse, so he’s the person you should share your soul with. When you need a shoulder to cry on, let him be that shoulder. Sure, you have a support system outside of your spouse, but you shouldn’t spill intimacies to someone else that you don’t share with your husband.
It means you keep your significant other’s secrets
Being faithful also means keeping trust. So you know when to hold your tongue to keep from sharing the intimate details of her life with others.
It means you delete your dating profiles
True committment to a relationship doesn’t mean having backup plans. So you don’t need Tinder and Match.com around to fall back on – let alone to fill spaces of time flipping through profiles.
It means you don’t hide texts from your spouse
You shouldn’t have a need to hide emails, messages or texts. Being faithful means you would never say something to another person that you would feel uncomfortable with your wife seeing.
It means not spending time alone with a member of the opposite sex
Just dropping by to hang out or meeting for lunch with someone of the opposite sex is not appropriate because it has the potential to build into a more complex relationship. There is no need to foster an intimate one-on-one relationship with a member of the opposite sex. Fidelity means avoiding any relationship that could eclipse your relationship with your spouse.
It means you don’t prioritize anyone above your spouse
Your life is full of wonderful and important people, but there is not one person who should come before your spouse. No matter if it’s a parent, boss or child, your spouse’s needs must come first. Being entirely faithful means that you pick them first, 100 percent.