Remember the boat scene from The Little Mermaid with the classic song ‘Kiss the Girl’? Parents wish their little girl’s first kiss will happen so fluid and musically. However, we all know the monumental “first kiss” moment is hardly monumental. It is usually awkward, rushed, and maybe even painful. Parents dread the day they have to sit down and talk to their son or daughter about that moment, and most parents usually don’t. How do you bridge the gap and get your starry-eyed son to actually sit down and talk about it? If there is a slight suspicion your child has had that awkward moment, they probably have. There are five ways to handle the situation that will result in a positive parenting moment that you can look back on without pain. No music necessary.
1. Let your teenager approach you
OK, maybe this will never happen in a million years, but if the moment is big enough, and if your child trusts you, there will be a small moment of opportunity when she will ask a question that could lead to a heart-to-heart. Look for those small questions or little conversations about daily life. Expound upon those conversations without appearing too eager. The best listener is one who truly “listens” and has no need to figure out top secret information that the child isn’t ready to share.
2. Don’t be afraid to ask
If Plan A fails and your child doesn’t ever seem to talk to you, don’t be too afraid to talk to them. Sometimes, all a teenager wants is someone to be interested in his or her life. As a parent, it is your turn to be that interviewer. Ask questions without being pressing, and ask them at the right time. Feel out the situation and be understanding.
3. Let your son/daughter hear your story
Share your first kiss story! It will not only bring you closer together, but it will also let your teenager understand that these moments happen to everyone. I know when I heard my mother’s first kiss story I was much more open and interested in her life and the fact that she was once a love-struck teenager, too.
4. Don’t push them to get that first experience
My first kiss didn’t happen until I was 18 years old, but because my mother was comfortable and relaxed, I didn’t feel the need to go out and kiss every frog. The best thing to do is let it happen when it happens because it will happen eventually.
5. When it does happen, don’t board up the windows or lock your teenager away
This is one of the first big memories your son or daughter will have for the rest of his or her life. When it happens, don’t be so quick to lock him or her away or hide them from the world. This is an important moment to some, and a miserable one for others, but by all means, don’t make it a bad one for your child.