Falling in love is like discovering the meaning of life, because for the first time you feel complete. Dr. Dennis Neder, author of Being a Man in a Woman’s World, states that love has three phases: the infatuation phase, the bonding phase and the familiar phase.
In the first phase (the infatuation phase) the couple can’t bear to be apart. This is the romantic state where many people think they are in love, but this phase doesn’t last long.
The second phase (the bonding phase), is when the couple begins to really get to know each other. Each person starts to plan their lives around this relationship. If the second stage thrives, the couple then moves on to the next stage.
The third phase (the familiar phase) is when the couple begins to truly understand each other and how their sweetheart acts and feels in different situations. This is when you begin to focus on your own life and goals to see if they will compliment the life and goals of your partner. The familiar phase is where true love begins, Dr. Neder says.
But in all of these stages, you can know if it’s true love if your man does these three things:
1. He does and says things with you in mind
A man who truly loves his wife cares for her, wants the best for her, empathizes with her and strives to make her happy. No matter the situation, he will put your best interest ahead if his own. “When you carefully consider your words, thoughts and actions and specifically how they will benefit that other person, you’re in love,” Dr. Neder says.
2. He accepts you as you are
If he truly fell in love with who you are, he won’t want to change you or turn you into someone you’re not. A man in love appreciates all his wife’s qualities, whether good or bad, because that’s what makes her unique.
A man in love doesn’t ask his wife to stop doing what she loves most: her hobbies, seeing friends and spending time with her family. Even if he doesn’t share the same interests, he knows what makes her happy, so he embraces the things she loves.
But for it to truly be love, both people in the relationship need to make these adjustments. Every couple must adapt in order to build and keep a healthy relationship, but they do not have to change who they are.
3. He commits to you
A man truly in love fully commits himself to one woman and to their relationship. They stay together regardless of the challenges they face. Commitment is what keeps the relationship strong.
One misconception many couples have is that true love hurts – but this isn’t true. There will be times when you don’t like your husband (misunderstandings and disappointments happen in every relationship) but you should always love him.
True love isn’t always easy, but it works when the couple strives to keep their relationship alive. Love helps you face life’s difficulties – it should never be the reason for your hard times. Let true love be your guide to finding happiness.
This article has been translated and adapted from the original, “Só é amor verdadeiro se ele já fez estas 3 coisas por você.” It was originally published on familia.com.br.
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