“A woman laughing is a woman conquered.” – Napoleon Bonaparte
I can say without a doubt, I definitely tend to fall for people who share my quirky and often off-beat sense of humor. Sharing a sense of humor is one of the most intimate ways I can think of to spend time with someone. Think about it: it’s how Roger Rabbit landed his infamous leading lady, Jessica Rabbit. And what do women name as a big attraction factor in a man? Survey says: sense of humor.
Laughing at the same thing for the same reason is a largely subconscious connection that bonds people together not only physically, but chemically. Laughter releases lots of chemicals in the brain:
give you a zap of energy, and heighten the senses and arousal.
bonds individuals and groups together; such as mothers to children after birth, and intimate partners.
gives you a bit of a high; just like falling in love, or jumping into a pool.
gives you an overall sense of well-being.
also increases oxygen in the blood, strengthens your immune system, and can decrease symptoms of depression.
Let’s face it, laughter really is the best medicine. And this feeling of health, well-being, connection and happiness shared between two people can be a potent elixir. So much of what determines if you enjoy someone’s company depends on whether or not they make you laugh.
Do you laugh at the same jokes?
Do you enjoy the same comedic entertainment? (movies, TV shows, comedians)
Do you understand each other’s humor when other’s don’t?
Do you come to the same punch lines without even trying?
I told a friend and spiritual worker that when it comes to friends and relationships, my motto is “Make me laugh, make me think or go away.” She laughed gregariously and agreed. Of course this is a curt exaggeration. But if history has taught me anything, I’ve learned the best connections I have, be it romantic or platonic, are with people who share in my indulgence in both intellect and comedy. Slapstick to sarcastic, wry or dry, I love to laugh. And I’m blessed to fall for men who love to laugh with me.
Laughter dulls pain, diffuses tension, makes difficult conversations easier, and reconnects two people after a spat. There are a lot of factors that play into someone’s sense of humor, and how they use it in life and in love. When you find someone who laughs when you laugh and can finish your silly sentences, you’ve found an amazing match. And if the laughter doesn’t start naturally, manufacture it:
Watch a funny movie or TV show.
Attend a live comedy show.
Make a play date with kid-style games.
Go to an amusement park.
Look each other in the eyes and give big compliments. At least one of you are guaranteed to giggle.
Hug for an outrageous period of time. And if you have to move, do it while still hugging.
Sharing a sense of humor with the one you love is a small piece of a much bigger solution. It indicates many cylinders are firing together and propelling your love into the next phase. As your love grows and your relationship evolves, laughter will save the day in more ways than you can even imagine in the beginning stages. So stay laughing, and stay in love!