Marriage takes work. Happy marriages are the products of couples who are not perfect, but who strive to work out disagreements, rely on each other through struggles and who keep God as a central part in their marriage. Becoming one in marriage does not happen overnight, nor can it be accomplished without the help of heaven.
Loving God first is a key to a unified marriage
In the Bible, Jesus was asked which of the commandments was the greatest. He answered, “…Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind. This is the first and great commandment. And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself. On these two commandments hang all the law and the prophets.” In other words, if we love God and our neighbor, then those two key principles will help us to not only follow the other commandments, but also make sure our marriages will be strong enough to withstand challenging times. Being righteous and learning how to love God and your spouse — your neighbor — is likely the most important part of becoming one in a marriage.
By keeping the commandments, we will have the companionship of God’s spirit
“It is only with the companionship of the Holy Ghost that we can hope to be equally yoked in a marriage free from discord. I have seen how that companionship is crucial for felicity in a marriage. The miracle of becoming one requires the help of heaven, and it takes time. Our goal is to live together forever in the presence of Heavenly Father and our Savior,” said Henry Eyring, a religious leader. Living righteously — worthy of the influence of the Holy Ghost — will help us to be more willing to give our spouse what they need and to be inspired as to things we can do to strengthen our marriage.
Living righteously still does not guarantee an easy life, but you will be strengthened through your trials. Eyring stated, “[l]ife in families will test us. That is one of God’s purposes in giving us the gift of mortality — to strengthen us by passing through tests. That will be especially true in family life, where we will find great joy and great sorrow and challenges which may at times seem beyond our power to endure them.” As we work together as a couple and as a family and seek God’s help, our trials become a teaching and refining process in our life. We will become closer to God and to each other through them.
Because the family unit, especially marriage, is under attack, it is necessary to work hard and to seek the help of heaven. God will help us, strengthen us and refine us so that we may become one as a couple and unified in our marriage. It may take a miracle, but with God’s help it is possible.