We know marriage can be hard sometimes. I think we’ve all been through a little fighting, some not-so-nice words and maybe even a little bitterness.
But what happens when the fighting, unkind words and bitterness don’t stop? What happens when you don’t feel a connection with your spouse anymore? What are you supposed to do when you feel like your marriage is so broken, it can’t be fixed?
Unless your marriage is physically, emotionally, mentally or sexually abusive, it’s not broken beyond repair. You can bring back the love you once shared with your spouse. Here are eight small things you can do to fix your marriage:
1. Attend marriage counseling
It might be the last thing you want to do, but if you and your spouse are both set on fixing your marriage, couples counseling can do wonders. Talking with a therapist and getting your feelings out in the open can help you work through your problems and find actual solutions.
2. Have physical contact every day
You don’t need to be intimate every day of the week to fix your marriage, but you do need some type of physical touch. Holding hands, a gentle touch on the shoulder or a little kiss can go a long way when your marriage is in a rough patch. These small gestures will remind you of your love for each other.
3. Reflect on why you fell in love
Don’t forget why you fell in love with your spouse. Remember the butterflies you got when you kissed for the first time and remember the feelings you had on your wedding day. Make lists of everything you love about your spouse and share it with them. Reflecting on your love story will remind you of what’s really important.
4. Spend quality time together
When life gets busy, it’s hard to find time to spend with your spouse, especially when your marriage is struggling. It’s so important to make time to connect every day, even if it’s just for a few minutes every night. Spending quality time together without distractions will do incredible things for your marriage.
5. Know why your marriage is suffering
Understanding what’s causing your problems will help you know the best way to fix them. Maybe there was a breach of trust, or maybe you’ve drifted apart. Whatever the cause may be, get to the bottom of it and make your marriage awesome.
6. Talk and listen
Communication is KEY to making marriage work. Make sure you’re constantly talking with your spouse and making sure you’re on the same page. Listening is just as important as talking, so put away all distractions when your spouse is talking to you. Couples are so much happier when they effectively communicate with each other.
7. Stop questioning
According to relationship expert Mort Fertel, couples tend to ask one detrimental question. They ask, “Did I marry the right person?” Fertel suggests getting rid of this question and ditching the idea that there’s a “right person.” The person you married is your spouse now, and they’re your person. Once you realize this you’ll be able to strengthen your relationship.
8. Quit talking and get to work
You can talk about your problems as much as you want, but you won’t get anywhere until you take action. Make the changes necessary to make your marriage great instead of constantly talking about it.
You’ll find so much happiness when you choose to put in the time to improve your relationship. Fixing a marriage is no easy task, but it’s possible when you put in an honest effort. And it’s so worth it.