Dating can be fun and adventurous, or it can be uncomfortable and miserable. What makes it frustrating are the assumptions we all seem to make about how dating is and isn’t supposed to go.
Through some digging, the myths have been cracked! Here are the secrets that will bring success to your dating life.
1. Myth: If there is no spark on the first date, you are wasting your time
First dates are scary! This is where you learn the other person’s goals, values, likes, dislikes, etc. You are not likely going to know whether you are compatible with this person until your second or third date when they feel more comfortable. If sparks don’t fly then, at least you can bail knowing that you gave him a chance and it just isn’t meant to be.
2. Myth: The more people I date, the closer I get to the perfect spouse
Dating is a game. To try and find your perfect match,people say that you have to date a lot of different people so that when you do find the right one, you will know. This is not the right way to approach dating. Choosing to only date the type of people you would potentially want to date long-term will allow you to get the dating experience you are looking for and will guarantee that you will find Mr. Right. It’s not quantity that matters, it’s quality.
3. Myth: Women are way too emotional and men stay calm and rational
Just because men do not typically open up about their feelings doesn’t mean they don’t enjoy crying to a sappy Nicholas Sparks film. It also doesn’t mean that they don’t go home sobbing when you don’t say ‘I love you’ back. Their emotions are just as present as women’s are, they just express it differently. Women have their girlfriends, sisters and mom to confide in, but men often have a few guy friends or just their girlfriend who they feel comfortable enough to open up to. And when they are comfortable, they will open up.
4. Myth: Online dating is ineffective and only desperate people try it
The success of Tinder and OkCupid can definitely prove otherwise. In just this year alone, about one-in-five young adults (18-25) reported that they actively use a mobile dating app. It may not be the most traditional way to meet the love of your life, but avoiding online dating for that reason alone can prevent you from a beautiful digital love story.
5. Myth: Living together before marriage is great preparation
Researchers at the University of Denver found that couples that live together before they get married have a higher divorce rate and lower marital satisfaction than those who waited until they were married. Many things can cause this. For example, some couples think it is cheaper to live together and then they feel stuck because of the financial investment that the relationship created. Make sure that you want to get married and start a life together before you take such a big step.
6. Myth: If you do not find them attractive on the first date, you never will
Attraction should occur soon, yes, but you may not find it on the first date. Once you get to know their personality after a few dates, you will better be able to guage if there is an attraction.
7. Myth: Men like being single
A recent study found that only 12% of single men actually prefer to stay single. Having that special someone to laugh with, cry with and open up to makes them feel loved. Most men also take the same, if not more time, to get ready for a date than women.
8. Myth: True love doesn’t last
My grandparents have been married for almost 50 years and I know their love continues to grow stronger. If the love is real, you will want to be together every day for the rest of your life.