Sometimes the fear of being alone allows some of us (myself included) to look beyond a man’s shortcomings and personality flaws. However, often those flaws are seriously toxic behaviors that are damaging to your mental and physical wellbeing. It’s not worth keeping these toxic men around – they are destructive and unable to change.
Here is a list of five toxic men you need to remove from your life:
1. The addict
This man could be addicted to drugs, alcohol, pornography or something else. But no matter the addiction, it’s best to abandon the hope that you can fix him or that he will change for you. The reality of this boyfriend is that he can only help himself. You can stay a strong friend for them if you wish but do not let him rob you of an amazing future. Just walk away. It’s not selfish, it’s just more important that you focus on keeping yourself happy and available for a healthy relationship.
2. The emotional vampire
This toxic man will slowly feed off your happiness and possibly your sanity. He is never satisfied with your efforts and wants you all to himself. You will be disconnected from your friends and family if you stay with this kind of man. He wants you to have on blinders and see only him, all of the time. Relationships with him are manipulative and frustrating. At times, his constant calls, texts, messages and location check-ins are so overwhelming you may feel like you’re losing part of your own identity.
Pull a disappearing act on this toxic man because this is a terrible relationship that will suck the joy out of your soul.
3. The bully
The bully is a toxic man who thinks he can control you because he’s a big man who has all figured out. He will tell you what to do, where to go and when to do it. It’s not uncommon for a bully to threaten you, restrain you, hide car keys and attempt to manipulate your freedom.
Don’t stay in his trap. Say no and get out of there, fast.
4. The grown-up boy
Sadly there are many adult men who are actually just grown-up boys. They may not be easy to spot right away; you may even be stuck with one and are just realizing it now. My advice is to get out now. The grown-up boy has video games on his mind, wants you to be his parent (instead of a partner) and offers little to nothing to the relationship. You may be second or third to his friends and partying. His dismal goals and poor career choice should be enough encouragement for you to find a real man.
5. The abuser
The toxic man is the most dangerous and deadliest. He may be a physical or psychological abuser. Regardless, he is harming you.
Remove him from your life like cancer. Most abusers will not go easily or willingly, but it’s vital to plan your get away. You may have to start at the court house with a restraining order and call the police to be there while you pack up your things. He will never change his unstable behaviors, so run from him like the house is on fire.
If you are in this kind of situation, please get help by contacting the National Domestic Violence Hotline online or by calling at 1−800−799−7233.
Friends, remove these toxic men if your life as quickly as possible. Be strong, be brave and don’t hold back. There a too many kind-hearted and amazing men out there that who would be perfect for you.