My husband ruined me. Yes, he completely ruined me. Growing up, I was quite the independent girl. I could stay all alone overnight without grasping a baseball bat at every little sound. I was even able to put together a bookshelf all by myself – with tools. However, once I married, I began to rely on my husband for so many things that I use to do myself. Even after five years of marriage, those feelings haven’t changed. In fact, I realize I need him more than ever.
Here are five reasons why I desperately need my husband and why you probably need yours as well.
He is my brains
You’ve heard the saying that two heads are better than one. In my case, this is true. When I have a question or need something fixed, the first person I turn to is my husband. In a marriage, it is crucial that you rely on one another. I hope your husband is your best friend. I hope that his opinion matters the most to you. A strong, healthy marriage is an equal partnership and that certainly doesn’t mean that one person takes care of everything while the other sits on the couch eating ice cream and watching Netflix.
He is my decision maker
We each face hundreds of decisions every single day. Some of those choices are large and life-changing while others do not make any difference. However, when those big decisions come that affect yourself or someone in your family, you and your husband need to agree on a decision together. You need to create a partnership. If I could make all the decisions in my family, we’d constantly be on vacation, drowning in debt and not having any focus in life. Thank goodness for a husband to keep our family level-headed and on track.
He is a place to vent
As a wife and a mom, it is easy to become irritated. It may be a rough day with the kids, or you may receive an unplanned bill. Whatever it may be, you need someone to vent to. You need someone to sit and listen as you complain about all the things that went wrong throughout the day or that are bothering you. He may not do much about it, but just getting it off your chest may be enough.
He is my future
When you look 10 or even 100 years down the road, the first thing you should see is your spouse. The relationship between you and your spouse is your most important relationship. You need to do everything possible today to ensure that relationship is strong and can withstand the harsh elements and obstacles that are going to be thrown its way. When you daydream and plan the future, make sure your spouse is there, holding your hand. Do not make any plans without him there.
He is my joy
I can honestly admit that my life would feel meaningless if I did not have my spouse. His jokes and teasing remarks are what make the 5:30 wake up calls from my toddler OK, his hugs are what keep the tears from flowing because of my burnt dinners, and his cuddles help me relax after a stressful day of errands and household duties. I loved my life while I was single, but I would never give up the worst of days for it again.
When life seems too hard, when things don’t seem just right, look at your spouse. What does he do to make your heart melt? How does he chase away any doubts or fears that you may have? How does he keep you happy, every single day? When those hard times come in a marriage, which they always do, think about those qualities. Think about why he brings you so much joy. Those hard times will quickly become easier.
Yes, I am a changed person from my single days. Yes, I rely on someone more than anything but life isn’t about me anymore. Marriage is about two people working hard, compromising, communicating and loving one another so they can overcome anything. It is about being that person for someone else, being there when it seems nobody else is, loving someone so intently that they never want to leave your side. My husband showed me that those qualities are real. He definitely ruined me.