Christian Carter, PhD, who studies couples and families, seems to have found what it is that men are looking for in a woman. The author of the bestselling book, Catch Him and Keep Him, has studied relationships for years and has figured out why some relationships evolve while others simply do not work. What makes the difference between success and failure? The answer has to do with maturity. Mature men are seeking relationships for life, and are choosing partners that have several things in common with them.
Of course, maturity is what marks the difference between men and boys. If the guy in your life finds these things attractive in you, you are dating a man — not just a boy. Keep an eye out for these characteristics:
A real man likes an optimistic woman
It seems like women are the ones to establish the level of emotional connection in a relationship, and real men don’t shy away from this. Emotional security and trust shows a high level of commitment, and lets your partner know you are together for more reasons than just lust. Sharing intimate feelings are just as important as sharing your rich sense of humor. A man falls in love with a woman who laughs easy, smiles and enjoys life. That’s someone he’ll want to build memories with.
A real man wants an independent woman
A real man wants a woman who is herself, and isn’t dependent on relationships to make her happy (but a kiss from him is always appreciated). This type of woman can make her own decisions, have her own dreams and work toward her own goals. A real man will appreciate a woman who has this kind of independence, instead of a girl who can’t make up her mind and is solely dependent on a man to be happy.
A real man wants an emotionally mature woman
Maturity goes both ways. Emotional commitment in a relationship will improve your relationship. Couples argue, and how you handle these arguments is crucial; it really shows your maturity … or lack of it. A real man won’t depend on rude insults and insensitive comments, but will listen to where you are coming from. A mature woman will do the same, choosing to not criticize or blame her man for problems. A successful couple knows how to handle their emotions, even in arguments. This level of respect is a beautiful part of a healthy, happy relationship.
A real man wants a woman he is intensely attracted to
Of course, physical attraction is important in any relationship. But to be intensely attracted to someone goes past that. A mature man looks for an attractive personality. He knows that beauty will fade, but a beautiful personality only gets better over time.
Trying to find a mature man? Be yourself, work on your own personal growth and self-control. Keep evolving and learn to be happy without a man by your side. When the moment arises, be open to accept him as he is and build a promising relationship together.
This is an adaptation and translation of the original article, “4 coisas que todo homem quer em uma mulher”. It has been republished here with permission.