You dress to impress on a first date, so you should obviously talk to impress too. Here are 15 things you should never say on the first date:
1. “We would make beautiful children”
Slow down, it’s your first date. You should be having fun and living in the moment, not thinking about marriage. Mentioning children can ensure you never have a second date with this person.
2. “My therapist told me…”
Seeing a therapist is fine and normal, but also somewhat personal. Save the personal conversations for later when you know the person better.
3. “So, how long until you’ll let me sleep with you?”
This is worse than asking about their past relationships. This implies you don’t really want to get to know them, you just want to have sex. Also, never ask how many people they have slept with on the first date. (But, that information is important to talk about when things start getting serious.)
4. “You remind me of my mom/dad”
You may think this is a compliment, but it’s not. Compliment your date on something you admire about them, and leave out the fact that your mom or dad share similar traits with them.
5. “Have you ever thought of losing a few pounds?”
This sentence will ruin your date. Any comment regarding one’s weight is rude and judgmental. Similar comments about unexpected hobbies or their personality will end the same way: your date will be furious.
6. “My ex always used to say…”
Leave your ex in the past, and if your ex isn’t in the past, what are you doing going out on a date? Never compare them to a previous lover, because it can be insulting or hint that you still have feelings for your ex and aren’t ready for a new relationship.
7. “Is your friend from your profile picture single?”
There are two red flags in this question. First of all, you are asking a person if their friend is single, hinting that you might want to take their friend out. Second, you just admitted to Facebook stalking. We all Google and Facebook stalk our love interests, but don’t mention it. That’s when things gets creepy.
8. “You’re not one of ‘those’ feminists are you?”
What if he/she is one of “those” feminists? Keep any controversial personal opinions to yourself until later. It’s good to be on the same page, but the first date allows you to get to know each other, so keep your conversations light and fun.
9. “I’m carrying three knives at all times and I have a bunch of guns at home”
This is simply creepy. You might have a valid reason, or perhaps it’s a fun hobby of yours, but keep your strange personality quirks/hobbies to yourself on the first date.
10. “I have a lot/no money”
Money is a sensitive, heavy topic. Don’t brag about your riches or your lack thereof. Money shouldn’t validate if a date is enjoyable or not. If you are lacking in the funds department, get creative and make more frugal plans (those dates are usually more fun anyway).
11. “It’s been 20 minutes and I still can’t figure out why you’re single”
Well, hopefully both of you are single. This backhanded compliment will not go over well and it can be a sensitive topic for the other party. It’s best to leave it for another time.
12. “Why would I move out of my parents’ house? I love it there!”
This screams that you are lazy and irresponsible, especially since you have no plans to move out. Independence is an attractive quality in all men and women.
13. “My friends say I’m too clingy, but I just like to throw all of myself into a relationship”
You should present the best picture of yourself on the first date. Comments like this raise a red flag and wave it in the other person’s face. Refrain from giving away any unnecessary information on the first date.
14. “If she didn’t want guys harassing her, she wouldn’t dress like that”
This is a deal breaker. No one should be harassed, and no one wants to date someone who is disrespectful. This comment will just put you on their “top 10 worst dates” list.
15. “I want to tell you a secret”
Just leave your secrets for later. Unless your secret is that you find your date attractive, secrets shouldn’t be shared on the first date.
Some of these topics eventually need to be discussed, but only when you are in a serious and committed relationship. Relax, think before you speak and enjoy your first date (you never know where it may lead).