Your heart pounds in your chest and butterflies do somersaults in your stomach. You can’t stop smiling at the way he looks at you, his eyes filled with love, desire and hope. But lately you feel more like roommates, bickering over who left the empty toilet paper roll in the bathroom.
In the midst of our busy lives, we can easily become comfortable and forget to do the little things that make our spouses feel loved and appreciated. Dedicate yourself to making time for these 13 essentials for marital bliss, and your husband won’t be able to help himself from falling in love with you all over again.
1. Stop nagging
He knows the garage needs to be cleaned, so asking him when he’s going to do it for the 98th time is not helping anyone. Eventually life becomes one long honey-do list and nagging is a surefire way to breed resentment and avoidance.
2. Stop criticizing him
Your opinion is so important to your husband, so harshly criticizing him is not only emasculating, it is guaranteed to extinguish your love. You have the power to build him up or tear him down with a single sentence, so stop keeping score of wrongdoings. The next time you go to complain or criticize something your husband has done, try instead turning your comment into a compliment.
3. Put on some real pants
We all know the routine; we get home from work and throw on “comfy” clothes. On days home with the kids we live in our old t-shirts and sweatpants. Our hair is often a mess and faces are bare with little to no make-up. But men are highly visual creatures and putting a little effort into your appearance (just for your husband’s benefit) will delight him in ways that he hasn’t felt since you were dating.
4. Flirt with him
Men like to feel desired and flirting is a great way to re-establish some intimacy. Laughing, joking and subtle touches can add a little mystery and make you both remember why you fell in love in the first place.
5. Be spontaneous and sexy
Ambush your husband and show him how desirable you find him. Send him flirtatious thoughts throughout the day to get him thinking about you. Set yourself up for success by paying attention to his signals, too.
6. Make a kind gesture
Do something kind and unexpected for your husband. Putting him first will catch him off guard, show him that you care and prioritize him, and help him begin to appreciate you.
7. Put his family first
Doing something kind for your husband’s family or loved ones is another way to show him that you prioritize his interests, and care about his family. Showing kindness towards his family will go a long way towards softening his heart.
8. Let him know he is your hero
Men want to feel needed. Secretly they want to be their wife’s hero. It may seem silly, but as much as men admire and respect strong, independent women, they also want to feel needed and appreciated. Make a point to tell him how much you value and admire him and what he does for you and your family. These simple words will show him how much you love and appreciate him, and let him know that he is still your hero.
9. Let him teach you about something he is passionate about (and enjoy it)
While you may not care about sports, hunting, history or cars, he does and you should show a little support. Join him on an activity that you normally wouldn’t, take some genuine interest in his interests, and let him teach you about something of his choosing. The key to this activity is embracing it and showing that you understand the significance of his hobby, and are interested in sharing your time learning about it with him.
10. Give him time with his friends (and don’t complain about it)
Just like you love calling your friends and enjoying the occasional girls’ night out, he needs time with his friends too. Stop being salty about it, let him go enjoy some bro-time and don’t complain. You will both be better for it.
11. Go on a real date
Go on a real date together….and no, this does not include going to the grocery store together and calling it a date. Get a sitter, and go out to do something. Whether it’s dinner or a baseball game, just spend some time alone together. Focus your discussions on special interests, recent experiences, shared dreams or just reminiscing. Whatever you do, do not talk about kids or money-two topics that are sure to ignite some disagreements and stress.
12. Try something new together
Most couples have a bucket list of things that they have always wanted to try together, but as life progresses it becomes easy to forget about your sense of adventure. Pick something that you have both always wanted to do (like a cooking class, skiing lessons or going to a concert) and do it!
13. Travel together
Whether it’s a weekend away or a 10-day cruise, spending time alone together will help you to escape the monotony of daily life and reconnect with the excitement of being a couple. Sharing new experiences and adventures together will help to grow and strengthen your bond.
Relationships are hard work. Over time it is easy for marriage to become repetitive, lackluster and even downright lazy. But it doesn’t have to be this way. You can reignite the spark and experience the exhilaration of falling in love and watching your husband fall in love with you all over again.