We’re all about open and honest communication between a husband and wife. You should always tell your wife your thoughts, feelings and concerns, and she should tell you hers.
But there are certain things you should actually never tell your wife – no matter how much you might want to:
1. “Stop talking”
Never tell your wife to stop talking. If she’s talking to you, she really wants you to know what she has to say. It may not seem important to you, and you might have to peel your eyes away from the football game for a minute, but take the time to listen to her. It’ll mean so much, and you’ll build a stronger relationship.
2. “It looks the same to me”
Your wife works hard to impress you, so notice when she does things a little differently (even if it really does look the same to you). Maybe she got a new haircut, or maybe she organized your closet. Whatever it is, make sure she knows you notice her efforts.
3. “You should be more like my mom”
Never ever EVER compare your wife to your mom. She already feels pressure from her to be perfect, and when you tell her you think your mom does things better, she gets really down on herself. Remember your wife and your mom are two completely different people.
4. “Maybe you should start coming to the gym with me”
Weight is a super touchy subject with many women, so be careful when you ask your wife to go to the gym. If you genuinely want to spend quality time with her and that’s the only time you’ll get that, explain it to her. But if you want her to shed a few pounds for your own pleasure, it’s best not to say anything and let her do it in her own time if she wants to.
5. “What did you do all day?”
Your wife does so much during the day, and it’s not your business to ask her what those things were if you’re being condescending about it. If you really want to know what she did because you want to hear about her life, ask away. But don’t assume she just sits and watches TV all day long.
6. “You never told me about that”
There’s nothing more frustrating than when your wife makes plans in advance, tells you about them, then you forget and say she never told you. If you honestly didn’t know, just apologize for not listening and attend whatever plans she made.
7. “Stop worrying and calm down”
Being a wife and mom means caring for a lot of people, and it can get exhausting. Women worry about things that are irrational sometimes, but you don’t need to remind her of that. Let her know you’re there for her and that her worries are valid instead of telling her to “calm down.”
8. “Why does that bother you? It would never bother me.”
Just because something doesn’t bother you, doesn’t mean it won’t bother your wife. You have different personalities and different brains – not everyone thinks the same way as you. If something’s bothering your wife, listen to her and try to make it better.
9. “I’m done”
Never say these words unless you really mean it. Experts say when you say this or threaten divorce, it scares your wife and makes it sound like you don’t care enough about the relationship to keep working at it.
10. “You wouldn’t understand”
If you’re going through something, your wife wants to be there for you. She wants to help you. So it’s hurtful to her when you say she wouldn’t understand and walk away. Maybe she doesn’t understand now, but she can understand if you try to explain it to her.
Marriage takes a lot of practice, and nobody’s perfect. You’ll slip up and say things you didn’t mean. Just make sure to apologize and move on when this happens – your marriage will be so much better for it.