This past year I had the pleasure of getting married. Being married was something that I had dreamed about my whole life, and being a newlywed was just as good as I imagined it would be.
However, I realized there was a distinct difference between being engaged and newly married, and that although some of these differences were great ones, there was also an adjustment period.
Here are ten things that I believe only those who have recently gotten married will understand:
1. Sleeping with someone in your bed
Having someone permanently in your bed is an adjustment. There usually is a discussion about what side of the bed you want, and it might be the one you are not used to. But that is all part of the lesson all newlyweds learn early on: compromise. At the same time, waking up next to the person you love is the best thing ever.
2. Going to the bathroom in front of your husband or wife
This was one that was extremely difficult for me because I hate going to the bathroom in front of anyone, let alone a boy. But there may be times when you are brushing your teeth, and they just go ahead and go to the bathroom. He may be nonchalant about it, but it may come as a surprise to you. But be prepared.
3. Being extremely poor
There are definitely exceptions to this one, being that you may have been one of those couples who are well established in their careers, or who have been saving up before marriage. But sometimes, even when that is the case, combining your bank accounts doesn’t necessarily mean there will be more money. Especially after that large and lavish party called a wedding that you had to pay for.
4. Having someone to talk to 24/7
One of the benefits of being married is that you now get to spend all of your time with your best friend. Your husband is now your confidant and partner, shoulder to cry on, and hand to hold. But there might be some times when you’ll need your space, but hopefully that won’t be very often.
5. Now you can have sex whenever you want
Some experts say that the first year of marriage a couple will have more sex than the rest of their years of marriage combined. Most newlyweds will agree.
6. It’s hard to find good “couple friends”
Being married means sometimes it can be awkward to hang out with your single friends. Logically, hanging out with other married couples seems like the best solution, but this is easier said than done. Finding the right couple friends that both you and your husband want to spend time with can feel like a challenge, one filled with awkward dinners and game nights that seem to never end.
7. Changing your name isn’t as easy as you think
This is for the ladies out there. Be aware that changing your last name is not as easy as signing a form when you get your marriage license. It is actually a whole process of getting a new social security card, new license, and all new debit and credit cards. But becoming the newest Mrs. So-and-so is worth it, right?
8. You want to be with your spouse all the time
I don’t know about you, but I found that I could not get enough of my husband when we were newly married. We would each come home straight after work or school just to be with each other, and never want to leave without them again. This is something that I hope lasts throughout everyone’s marriage, not just in the beginning. Hopefully you are always happy to be with your lady or man!
9. You go through a recluse period as a couple
See numbers 4,5, and 8, and you will find this to be true. It is like the rest of the world doesn’t exist and it is just you and your husband and wife forever. But eventually you will have to leave your newly formed newlywed nest and each other. Don’t worry though- they will always be there when you get home.
10. The newlywed 15 pounds
This is like the “freshman 15,” but for newlyweds. Not every couple faces this problem, especially if you make it a point to always do active things with your spouse. But the temptation to Netflix and chill is always there, which can lead to some weight gain. Just make sure to motivate each other to be happy and healthy and to exercise, and it will all work out in the end. Plus, sex is a great way to burn calories.
In the end, being a newlywed is a special time where you and your new husband or wife can enjoy the first precious moments of marital bliss, even when it comes with a few adjustments. Luckily you have the rest of your lives to figure it all out!